IF ONE HEARS

She stands across from me on the other side of the counter.

I’m picking up a birthday cake - time to celebrate the soon-to-be-16-year-old man child that is my nephew. The store is empty, save the two of us and as I hand over a tip she thanks me. In the silence of the place she is instantly talkative and when I pause and turn my feet and body toward her, she begins to tell me of her life.

She’s a single mom, has a cat and a few guinea pigs. She manages the store, has been here since it opened, since she was seventeen. Her car is in the shop, I think she mentions the transfer case, and she does InstaCart to help make ends meet.

You’re superwoman, I tell her.

I’m trying, she responds.

Aren’t we all, my friend, aren’t we all.

I tell her she’s doing a good job. You’re rockin’ it, mama. I hope she hears me - really deep, deep down hears me.

As I leave I wonder at her life. How many nights does she sit pondering the ways that she is  failing? How often does she glance at the world around her and determine that she does not measure up? How many times has she chosen to hide instead of showing up as her full self?

I get it - we’re all trying, my friend, we’re all trying.

On the drive to the store I was trapped in my own thoughts, ping pong balls bouncing around between ‘what ifs’ and ‘whys.’ Does this really all matter? I caught my brain begging. These things I long to say to women, could things really be different?

Will anyone listen? Deep, deep down listen?

I’ve looked inside myself and know that this girl needs to listen, this girl needs to hear that regardless of how she feels, she has what it takes. This girl needs to know that there is another way. 

And in that moment picking up an ice cream cake, I saw into the woman across the counter. No doubt she has spent tearful moments in isolation wondering why life has to be so hard. No doubt she has been surrounded by people and yet felt strangely alone. No doubt there have been moments when she was convinced she had lost her way.

What if at least she would listen? Deep, deep down listen?

What if at least she would hear that her strengths are beautiful and so are her weaknesses? That there is power in her, right alongside all of that need. That she was made for this life and there is hope to be had, hard things and all.

Celebrate and mourn, I’d tell her, embrace the wins and the losses. Live life out loud - authentically and vulnerably out loud. Your best is most certainly more than enough and we are cheering for you to be fully alive.

Be brave, strong one, I’d say, the world waits for superwoman to be seen.

If one would listen it would be enough, if just the girl in the mirror truly ‘got it,’ so much could change. But I hope we’ll all listen, I hope we’ll all realize that we truly are superwomen.

I hope we’ll unbury the truth written on our hearts, find the outline of the girl etched in the dirt and refuse to hide our true selves ever again. I hope we’ll do it for the ones who came before us, I hope we’ll do it for the ones that will follow.

I hope we’ll realize we’re worth doing it just for ourselves.

If one could hear, it would be enough.

So be brave, strong one, the world waits for superwoman to be seen.